Well, the past three weeks have pretty much been a blur. I say that probably because the lack of sleep is beginning to blur my vision. Its tough sometimes, being so responsible. Because I've been so busy taking care of everyone/everything else, my personal responsibilities have been slacking. Like the fact that I have several not-quite unpacked bags on the floor of my room-from more than one trip. Or the fact that my bedroom could use a good vacuuming (I don't sweep carpet).
And then all this other random crap has been going on, like trying to get my insurance changed over to be from UD instead of through my parents, or getting a flat tire yesterday, or having to go to an old fart breakfast this morning. Plus my roommate always has something dramatic going on, and I have to be the supportive friend-even though she's making all of her own problems and won't listen to advice to improve them.
Plus, I'm really tired of being single. I know, I know-broken record...I keep repeating myself. But I have a serious need for some cuddling. I need to be able to come home from a crappy day like yesterday and say, "can we just curl up on the couch for a few?". I may not look it, but I'm emotionally needy. I guess I'm just pretty decent at hiding it. But anyone who's had me hang all over them or curl up in their lap at a party while I was drunk knows what I'm really like.
It probably doesn't help that a female friend told me over the weekend that I now have the equivalent of an internet boyfriend (how depressingly pathetic) and then my roommate points out that it is just a shining example of how I create long distance/unmaintainable relationships (like she knows anything about a successful union of two people). I will just blame her statement content on the lack of eligible bachelors in the metropolitan area.
I'm having one of those moments of doubt right now. One of those "I should just quit school after my masters, find some guy to settle down with, marry and make babies" moments. It just makes me laugh because I'm probably only a day or two away from having my future PhD school review my application (just waiting for that one last recommendation letter to float in).
Ever wish you could have a sober person by whom you could run any statements you plan to make when drunk? I think I would benefit greatly from this setup. Not that I'm not humorous when I say these things, but its not all that much fun to watch yourself saying stupid things on video the next day.
I apologize for the wandering-my brain is too sleep deprived to stay on any one thought for too long...
Americans should have siestas built in to the work day.
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